The High Cost of Staying Silent—and the Gifts That Come When You Speak Up
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If Not Now, When? The Gifts of Refusing to Stay Silent
There is a moment in every life, every profession, and every society when silence becomes its own kind of harm. A moment when “staying out of it” or “not picking a side” is no longer a neutral stance, but a quiet endorsement of whatever is unfolding.
That moment is here.
For therapists, healers, business owners, CEOs, faith leaders, artists, makers, writers, educators, and anyone with a platform—large or small—the days of silent observation must end. If not now, when?
Silence Is Compliance — And Don’t Think People Don’t Notice
We therapists, healers, managers, executives and artists tell clients, employees, and colleagues every day that boundaries matter, alignment matters, honoring your authenticity matters, stating your convictions matter, and using your voice matters. And yet many leaders still remain quiet online, quiet in their communities, quiet in their spheres of influence—hoping neutrality will protect them.
But silence sends a message.
And people notice.
Clients notice.
Employees notice.
Colleagues notice.
Friend notice.
Your children notice.
Your community notices.
Silence says, “This issue isn’t important enough,” or “I’d rather protect my comfort than confront harm”, or “I might risk something.” Silence communicates complicity even when complicity is not the intention.
And at this moment in history, silence is not kindness, professionalism, or diplomacy. Silence is consent.
Speaking Up Comes With Risks — And Also Gifts
Let’s be honest: speaking truth to power is not always easy.
Yes, you may lose friends.
Yes, you may lose followers.
Yes, you may lose people who only loved your silence, not your integrity.
But here’s the part most people don’t talk about - when you stop shrinking, the world expands.
Using your voice—clearly, bravely, unapologetically—often brings unexpected gifts
Doors open that silence would have kept shut. People who share your values find you. Aligned individuals show up with clarity and respect. You get invited into rooms and conversations you never knew existed.
New opportunities emerge. Speaking out signals leadership. Leadership attracts trust. And trust opens opportunities—partnerships, collaborations, speaking engagements, media features, and professional relationships built on shared integrity.
Your respect increases. People trust those who are willing to take a stand, even when it’s uncomfortable. Integrity is magnetic. Authenticity is recognizable. Courage commands respect.
Your inner world shifts too. Your nervous system stops holding the tension of pretending. Your self-respect grows. Your values align with your behavior. Your peace expands because you know you told the truth when it mattered.
Speaking out may close a few doors (or hearts)—but the ones that open will be the right ones.
Social Media Is Our Biggest Megaphone
For better or worse, social media is where the world now gathers. It is the modern public square. It is the most powerful platform most of us will ever have—not because we have hundreds of thousands of followers, but because the people we do reach are real humans, real clients, real community members looking for guidance, clarity, and courage.
We cannot underestimate the impact of using our voice online:
A single post can shift someone’s perspective.
A single statement can reduce someone’s shame or fear.
A single act of clarity can encourage someone else to speak up too.
Quiet acts of service also matter—donating, volunteering, resting, creating joy as resistance. But these cannot replace the need for spoken truth.
This is the time to use every tool we have.
Every platform we have.
Every ounce of influence we hold.
While memes and quotes and songs and scriptures are all important and contribute, this is also the time to be clear in your convictions. To state your truth boldly.
Joy Is Resistance — But Voice Is Responsibility
“Joy is an act of defiance.” I’ve seen this floating around social media, and I agree…sort of. Yes, joy lifts the nervous system. It reminds us of our humanity. It gives us some relief when the world feels fractured. All of this is important and good.
But please remember that joy alone cannot challenge power.
Joy alone cannot dismantle harm.
Joy alone cannot protect the vulnerable.
Joy is medicine—but voice is responsibility.
We must speak.
We must act.
We must show up.
We must refuse to be silent witnesses to injustice and cruelty.
Because if not now, when?
If not us, who?
This Is Our Moment
History is shaped by those who refused to swallow their truth.
Society is moved forward by those who chose integrity over approval.
The future is protected by people who speak out, even when their voice shakes.
This is our moment to speak truth to power—clearly, bravely, and courageously.
You may lose some people.
But you will gain your voice.
You will gain your integrity.
You will gain a community of people who value truth over comfort and humanity over silence.
And the world—whether it tells you or not—will be better because you spoke.
If not now, when?
I stand with you. I stand with compassion, empathy, clarity, and truth. I stand with every person choosing courage over silence and integrity over comfort. I stand with those who have lost their lives, and with those whose lives are being shattered by cruelty and inhumanity. I stand with the families of Renee Good, and Alex Pretti, and Keith Porter, Jr., and Marimar Martinez, and so many others, and I stand with their grieving families, friends, and colleagues. I stand with children being ripped from their families, their safety stolen and their innocence interrupted. I stand with women being detained and sexually abused by their captors, enduring horrors no human being should ever face. I stand with hardworking people of color who are terrified, targeted, and treated as though their humanity is negotiable. I stand with every person whose dignity is being stripped away by systems that were built to break them.
And I stand with all who still believe that our communities, our country, and our world can be better than this moment—because they can. This is not about politics, it is about human decency, compassion, and integrity. We may not all have the same platform, but we each have a voice, and now is the time to use it. When we speak up together—peacefully, openhearted, and united—we become impossible to silence. Doors open that fear would have kept closed. Change begins where courage gathers. And together, we rise.
I stand with you,
Mari A. Lee, LMFT, CSAT-S, CPTT-S, MBATT-S